apparently needs VICODIN.!

Break Up

This is a completely utterly random thoughts which does not relate with any kind of real life.
But this is inspired by an acceptable beautiful story of other life, fictional case, other people, other place, different time, other story, another selves. I just made them a pretty words though.

Been up all night, listening to your voice
I feel it started to fade away
With any kind of possibility
Then you drift away

I'm thinking of you, solely
I don't ever want to forget you
The best part and your worst, only
I always want to miss you

My weary soul is aching
Your presence is all I ever need
There's nothing else I can't do
I just need to hear you sing

For a moment I thought you were there
Been calling up your name
Unanswered question brings me memories
Seeing your innocent eyes, my bliss

Your dreamy touch lingers
Songs you wrote left me unbroken
Love you gave shaped a smile
I wish you the best, I guess

One day I will see you
My heart stays missing you
Dear lover, I will let you go
But a part of me still adore you so

Labels: love, thoughts

"God love your soul and your aching bones.."

2:50 PM

0 COMMENTs {pick me, choose me, love me!}

Pilot

Pilot
Jika Anda adalah penggemar serial barat, dari negara Amerika Serikat terutama, Anda pasti familiar dengan kata PILOT. Pilot merupakan istilah lain dari "episode pertama season pertama" sebuah serial barat. Awalnya, saya memperhatikan hal ini lewat serial favorit saya, Lost. Pada saat itu saya masih menggunakan DVD bajakan sebagai sarana untuk menonton serial kesukaan. Karena DVD bajakan itu sudah merupakan adaptasi dari DVD original, maka memang tampilannya menyerupai aslinya, ada bonus features, dan setiap episode diberi judul.

Awalnya saya mengira Pilot merupakan judul dari episode pertama serial Lost. Hal ini tidak mengherankan, sebab kebetulan atau bukan, episode Lost pertama yang membuat syok adalah scene pilot Oceanic 815 dimakan oleh hewan di hutan. Sekedar intermezzo saja, pilot itu adalah Greg Grunberg yang merupakan karib dari J.J. Abrams, Anda akan menemui Grunberg main sebagai Office Matt Parkman dalam serial Heroes. Namun, ketika menyadari hal yang sama pada serial Desperate Housewives, saya mulai sadar bahwa episode perdana serial barat di sana dinamakan PILOT. Hal ini terjadi ketika saya menonton serial-serial lain, seperti Grey's Anatomy, Brothers and Sisters, Prison Break, Ugly Betty, Heroes, Gossip Girl, CSI NY, House MD, hingga yang terbaru Fringe dan 30 Rock.

My Choices
Bagi saya, episode perdana atau PILOT ini merupakan jalan yang paling awal untuk menarik perhatian saya untuk memilih melanjutkan menonton serial atau tidak. Hebatnya, percaya atau tidak saya melanjutkan hampir semua serial yang sudah saya tonton PILOT nya. Yah, paling tidak walau saya tak dapat menonton keseluruhan episode dari seluruh season, saya tetap setia mengikuti jika serian tersebut main di channel TV kabel saya. Kebanyakan saya bahkan mengoleksi seluruh season dan menontonnya dengan setia. Sebut saja Desperate Housewives, Lost, Heroes, Brothers and Sisters, dan Heroes. Sementara serial lain seperti Prison Break, Ugly Betty, dan Gossip Girl memang saya rehatkan sebab jalan ceritanya makin lama makin tidak menyenangkan bagi saya. Walau saya tetap berpendapat Ugly Betty adalah serial yang patut saya tonton selanjutnya.

Serial seperti House MD dan CSI NY, saya ikuti dengan menonton di AXN, channel di Indovision di rumah. Sedangkan CSI Miami, 90210, Supernatural, Ghost Whisperer, Private Practice bagi saya kalah menarik dengan daftar tonton saya yang lain. Sehingga sehabis menonton salah satu episode, saya tak pernah menontonnya kembali. Sekarang, saya menambah daftar tontonan baru untuk hal-hal yang disebut sinetron di Indonesia ini. Saya membeli Fringe, True Blood, Damages, Mad Men, dan 30 Rock. Hingga saat ini saya sudah menyentuh Fringe dan 30 Rock. Kombinasi yang cukup menarik! Fringe adalah serial yang dapat membuat otak lelah dan 30 Rock adalah serial ngocol yang bisa menjadi alternatif jika stres.

It Forces Us!
Berbekal referensi yang baik, yaitu daftar nominasi Golden Globe Awards atau Emmy Awards serta beberapa website luar negeri, saya cukup puas menonton serial-serial dan seringkali terkagum-kagum dengan PILOT yang berhasil mengundang decak kagum, baik penonton luar negeri maupun saya. Kemudian mempersuasi audiens untuk menonton episode berikutnya, bahkan mengundang mereka untuk tidak melewatkan jam tayang serial tersebut di televisi.

My Life and My Only Dreams
Pilihan-pilihan itu seringkali terlalu banyak dan berdesakan dalam pikiran saya. Namun, merupakan salah satu hal yang dapat membuat saya belajar banyak. Banyak pelajaran hidup, nilai-nilai, dan hal-hal hingga bahasa baru yang saya dapatkan berbekal melihat serial televisi. Memang terdengar simpel dan membosankan, bahkan bisa-bisa dikira pekerjaan orang malas. Namun, saya pikir ketergantungan saya terhadap mereka (ya sekarang menonton serial barat seperti candu dan menenangkan hati saya, guilty pleasure), baik juga terkadang.

Ketidakmampuan saya untuk mobile seringkali membuat saya tertinggal film keluaran terbaru, tetapi serial televisi menjadi cara baru bagi saya untuk belajar dan memahami sesuatu yang saya pikir, berbeda. Berbagai genre dan tema unik yang saya pilih, bisa jadi merupakan kosa kata baru bagi kehidupan saya. Bahkan saat ini kecintaan itu berubah menjadi mimpi, atau kalau boleh saya ingin menyebutnya sebagai harapan baru. Ya, saya harap saya bisa menjadi seorang penulis naskah untuk serial barat. Ya! Barat lho, bukan Indonesia. Sehingga mungkin suatu saat nanti saya bisa membagikan sesuatu buat orang lain, seperti ketika saya dihidupkan kembali oleh para creator dengan cerita fiksi yang hanya dapat saya pandangi di layar komputer saya. Sayang, ya!

PS: lagi kesurupan pingin nulis artikel, walau tidak diperiksa lagi pembagian sub judulnya serta bagian dalam (kecuali kata2 bukan indonesia dimiringkan aja).

Labels: everyday, Life, List, love, review, TV Series

"God love your soul and your aching bones.."

8:39 PM

0 COMMENTs {pick me, choose me, love me!}

Elevator Love Letter

Grey's Anatomy Season 5 - Elevator Love Letter

Cristina: I don't think ... I can't handle this after all.
Owen: What, what do you mean, what are you saying?
Cristina: I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry. But I'm lying here in your arms, and I'm afraid to fall asleep.

Meredith: I'm engaged.
Cristina: I broke up with Owen.

Cristina: Did her vitals remain stable the entire time?
Meredith: Were there any spikes in her intracranial pressure?
Alex: Was there any residual tumor?
Bailey: Shepherd was able to resect all of the tumor. She'll be in packing view for about an hour. She's fine. Your friend is just fine, no thanks to any of you. Tomorrow, do better!

Richard: What are you all doing out here?
Alex: Waiting for Izzie, Sir. We're waiting.
Richard: You're scared. I'm scared too.

Meredith: I'm worried about you.
Cristina: Meredith.
Meredith: Choking.
Cristina: Stop.
Meredith: It's unacceptable.
Cristina: Back off.
Meredith: Hands around the neck.
Cristina: Ring thrown in your face.

Derek: Ok, clamp. I am ready to... no. Yes, ok. I am ready to buzz the superficial temporal artery. Tenting sutures.
Bailey: There's no rush. You can take your time. Everyone here is on your side.
Swinder: You sure that's gonna hold? With all that friable scar tissue.
Bailey: Dr Swinder! Ah, actually I saw Dr. Shepherd do three different craniotomies last month, each with easily double the amount of friable tissue. They held just fine.
Derek: Next, tenting suture please.

Meredith: Surgery has started.
Cristina: Hey, have they started the surgery yet?
Alex: Yep.
Intern: Dr. Grey, we were wondering did Dr. Stevens' surgery start yet? Or...
Meredith: Keep it moving. No loitering in the OR hallway, that's the rule.
Alex: If they wanna stay, let them stay. People are better than no people.

Callie: Ok, so I get why I haven't been camped out at Izzie's beside holding her hand today, but...
George: We're not talking about this.
Callie: Why not?
George: Maybe it's the fact that I asked Izzie a hundred times what was wrong, and she just ignored me. And then there's the fact that when she actually needed help she trusted Cristina. Of all people!
Callie: And then there's the fact that she's your best friend and she might die on you. There's also that. Come on. We are going to go wait for Izzie. Come on. George! You were my husband and you slept with her. You are the reason that I wished her dead. You owe me this. You can lie to yourself all you want, but I know you. I loved you once, and I know you care if she lives or dies.

Derek: We'll see you soon Dr. Stevens.
Izzie: I hope so.
Bailey: Know so.
Izzie: Dr Bailey if something goes wrong...
Bailey: It wont.
Izzie: The scarf, I made it for you.
Derek: It's a beautiful night to save lives. Let's get started.

Derek: Meredith.
Meredith: What are you doing? You're gonna have to re-scrub.
Derek: I'm not ready.
Meredith: Yes you are.
Derek: I need to know that at least I have you, no matter what happens in there, i need to know. I need you to say yes. I need to know.
Meredith: I can't say yes. Not if agreeing to be with you forever will make it ok if Izzie dies. I can't say yes. I love you, and you can do this. You can do this. I know you can.

Richard: Ah, It's not a good time, he's still scrubbing in.
Meredith: I know, it's just, ah, he should wear this. It's his ferry boat scrub cap. He loves ferry boats.

Callie: I wished Izzie Stevens would die. I wished her dead every day, of every week, for I don't even know how long. I woke up every morning, wishing Izzie Stevens would die, and now... What kind of person wishes someone would die? What kind of doctor wishes, knowing how things happen. What kind of doctor wishes...
Arizona: Are you in here, right now, praying for Izzie to die?
Callie: No. I'm praying for her to live.

Meredith: Hey, How's Izzie?
George: I don't know.
Meredith: How's Izzie?
Cristina: Why?
Meredith: Have you been to see her?
Cristina: No I've been working with Swinder all day.
Alex: What?
Meredith: Have you been to see Izzie?
Alex: No, haven't you?

Richard: Did you talk to Izzie about this yet? Considering you two are basically conceiving a child together today, don't you think you should talk with her about this?
Alex: Look, you said she needed my contribution. Here's my contribution. Whatever.

Alex: The Chief send you in here?
Meredith: Nope. I offered to come in. In case you needed to talk.
Alex: Hah, you think talking will help? You think a dixie cup full of my swimmers will make everything ok? It's crap. This is crap! You just can't go messing with peoples heads like that. Even if she freezes the embryo's do you think, you think we'll get a chance to use them? You think she'll still be here? YOU THINK SHE'LL SURVIVE ALL THIS? You think... I think...She told me... she told me she was seeing a ghost ok. And I'm so used to all the crazy chicks in my life, that I didn't even... I'm a doctor. A DOCTOR! And I didn't even think to... and now she's... this is wrong. This isn't how it's supposed to happen.
Meredith: I know.
Alex: It's crap!
Meredith: I know.
Alex: I hate this.
Meredith: I know.
Alex: This isn't... this isn't how we were supposed... this isn't how I wanted to do this. This isn't how Izzie and I were supposed to make a baby.

Derek: Karev, I just reviewed Izzie's most recent MRI and it doesn't look like the tumors grown since her last scan, so that's good news. Do you have an questions or concerns that you'd like to discuss with me before we brief Izzie?
Alex: Just try keeping her frontal lobe inside her skull this time.

Bailey: Ok, as you know you have stage 4 metastatic melanoma. You have a lot of surgeries, and a lot of procedures lined up for you over the next few weeks.
Richard: We've seen evidence of METS on your liver, so one of those surgeries Dr. Bailey and I will resect them. We also lined up Dr. Parker from OB to harvest as many healthy eggs as she can before you undergo any radiation.
Izzie: Right. Babies.
Bailey: Just leaving the option open for you if you want it.
Derek: But our priority today is to address the temporal lobe METS on your brain. I'm surprised we didn't catch it sooner. This kind of thing can cause headaches, seizures and intense hallucinations. But, hopefully the legion has a clear margin so I can remove it all.

Meredith: You're wearing a turtle neck under your scrubs. It's ugly. Not as ugly as the fact that you hugged him. You hugged him.
Cristina: I get it. I hear you. Lets move on.
Meredith: Turtle necks aren't ok. You're not ok, and your boyfriends not ok.
Alex: Is your boyfriend ok?
Meredith: What?
Cristina: Pardon?
Alex: To be cutting into brains today. Is he ok to be back?
Meredith: Yes. Of course. Derek is fine.
Alex: I was there for his carnage in the OR remember? This isn't just any patient today, this is Izzie.

Meredith: It's me. Cristina! What's going on? Owen's out there upset. Callie was screaming. She said...
Cristina: I'm fine. I'm... I'm fine.
Meredith: OH MY GOD! Your neck. I will kill him! He's...
Cristina: No, no, no. It was a nightmare. He had a nightmare.
Owen: Cristina, please. Is she alright? Meredith, I just need to know that she's alright.
Meredith: No, no, no, no, no, no. Cristina, no!

Labels: friends, Grey's Anatomy, love, Quote, TV Series

"God love your soul and your aching bones.."

9:28 AM

0 COMMENTs {pick me, choose me, love me!}

The Kindness of Strangers Part 1

The Art of Jack and Kate
~LOST~
Kate Centric

I remember when I first met you
You asked me if I could stitch your wound up
I was joking that
I could throw up on you and you laughed with me

You asked my name even if it's just for icebreaker
And you told me your name's Jack
Hey Jack, my name is Kate..

You were the first people
I knew On an island where we stranded on
Within months I tried to know the island
I tried to know you
As I was scared like everyone else did
you were comforting me
Eventhough you said some words on the opposite

You said that we are already dead
and no one will never find us
But as I learned, I felt I was in heaven
and though I still am afraid
I knew you are facing the same fears with me s
o then I am bold and fearless

One day, you went somewhere place
I am curious and I asked If I could come with you
You forbid me as I insisted on it T
hank you for letting me be safe
But I rather faced a scary outside as long as I'm not further away

I am the one who knew you
When people are lying they don't look me in the eyes
But you did the exact opposite
But the way you loved me
or perhaps the way I loved you
is facing a way too long distance

you were always by my side
but you're not even close
and then another came and
I was hoping I let you down
I know you are
I know you tried to let me be safe and warm
even If you're not with me anymore you push me away to him
Oh! The guilt

Since we were breaking apart
I know you hoped me for a better future
but what if I'm mistaken
what if it's all your ego
what if it wasn't me you tried to hold

So then again
We faced another separation
Now help me to let go all the pain
and the fact that it's too late
and we're way too far behind

I'm still not over you, Jack
I was hoping you said "because I love you" earlier
But I am glad you finally ease my doubt
Still, I wish we could take care for each other
Always, I wish you well
For better for worse
I have always been with you

Kate

Labels: LOST, love, poetry, TV Series

"God love your soul and your aching bones.."

8:19 PM

0 COMMENTs {pick me, choose me, love me!}

Something's Coming

Well, you know I've been thinking that life could get easier if I had some extra money... I can conquer everything in this world, and I'm not that bad person who use money to shut people up!

I read some great proverb from Conception Piccioto, a demonstrant at White House for years (unbelieveable!)...:
We have to survive, so we can sacrifice...
It inspires me at most this weekend... Because I'm a survivor in this small world, who survive in this hectic chaos time and space in order to sacrifice myself for people whom I don't even know, for circumstances I didn't want, for times I don't count....

I want to love myself even more, because this is it! I don't have to serve people the way people serves me... Who's gonna love me better than I do? So, if I didn't have me and if I don't even know myself, so who will? If nobody cares about all this stuff we did together, so why should I?

Sedihnya melepaskan kesempatan berharga, hanya jika harus berkutat dengan something I'l always need to fix...
So, I wish myself well...

Labels: Life, love, proverb

"God love your soul and your aching bones.."

2:07 PM

0 COMMENTs {pick me, choose me, love me!}

Angels and Monsters

Wah, ini dikasi "tugas" dari Miss Desi sama Valen yang men tag saya... Ahem... Isi ah, menuh2i blog baruu
1. Each blogger must post these rules
2. Each blogger starts with ten random facts/habits about themselves
3. Bloggers that are tagged need to write on their own blog about their ten things and post these rules. At the end of your blog, you need to choose ten people to get tagged and list their names.
4. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’ve been tagged and to read your blog.

1. Apa ya yang pertama? Oh, sifat aja ya… Sifat dan karakter saya itu lebih didominasi buruk… Saya ini orangnya mengambil almost semua sisi negatif dari melankolis dan sisi positif saya adalah sebagai orang plegmatis (positif ta iki?).. Ya pokoknya menurut tes yang saya pernah kerjakan dari buku teman saya, saya ini ingin yang aman-aman saja, saya hanya ingin melihat ‘peace’, dan cenderung mendamaikan suasana… Kalau saya lagi kumat melankolisnya, saya menulis semua bagian buruk dari diri saya. Saya juga akan berpikir saya adalah manusia yang tidak memiliki sisi positif di samping saya lumayan tinggi (badannya) hahahaha....

2. Saya menyukai, mencintai, dan menggilai suatu karya seni yang berbentuk film. Baik itu film TV maupun film yang tayang untuk cinema… Jika memilih tontonan, saya akan cenderung melihat pemain film, baru keunikan cerita atau tema, dan yang terakhir sutradara dan perkataan atau rekomendasi teman. Saya lebih memilih film yang punya keunikan cerita dan penyampaian, misalnya sinematografi yang bagus, dll daripada film yang ceritanya sinetron ahahah…

3. Saya cinta mati pada serial Lost, Grey’s Anatomy, Desperate Housewives, Brothers and Sisters! Acara lain yang juga saya gemari adalah House MD, Heroes, American Idol, CSI: NY. Dan saya sudah berulang kali menebarkan fakta ini…Apa yang saya sukai? Scriptnya!

4. Saya orangnya lebih kepada “menulis” daripada “berbicara”. Saya takut public speaking, tidak bisa dan dulu tidak mau. Tapi sekarang sudah bisa dan kemampuan saya bertambah. Dari dulunya yang presentasinya baca ngeplek ga berani lihat penonton, ke sekarang membaca dikit2, lihat tembok, dan dengan muka kebelet beol (tapi setidaknya saya mau)…hahahahah.. Sebaliknya saya lebih nyaman menjawab pertanyaan dengan menuliskan jawabannya.. Makanya kalo saya nulis makalah biasanya lebih bagus daripada ketika saya ditanyai dosen...

5. Saya orang yang memiliki harapan sangat besar (dan berlebihan). Dulu saya bercita-cita menjadi interpreter yang bisa berbahasa Inggris, Perancis, Italia, Spanyol, Jepang, Korea, China, Russia. Setelah saya masuk Fikom, saya ingin menjadi dokter spesialis bedah toraks (geblek!). Dan wish terbesar saya adalah menjadi scriptwriter Hollywood yang digaji dan diperlakukan layak.

6. Saya sadar tanggung jawab saya sebagai anak sulung dan sebagai MANUSIA. Maka saya mulai biasakan dari dulu untuk dapat bekerja semampu saya. Jika dapat diselesaikan hari ini, mengapa harus ditunda besok? Walau saya juga sering melanggarnya, saya tahu bahwa saya tidak akan dapat menelantarkan pekerjaan saya. Karena kebiasaan ini, banyak yang mengira saya ini sok pinter, sok bisa, kerajinen, parno, berlebihan dan lain-lain. Tapi toh kerja keras saya sebagian besar terbayar luar biasa baiknya. Saya juga tahu bahwa memang inilah gunanya hidup, untuk melakukan pekerjaan dan bukan hanya senang-senang.

7. Saya makan 5-8 kali sehari. Mulai dari makan besar hingga ngemil. Oleh karena itu, dari kecil pun saya tak pernah kurus. Saya juga sebal jika dibilang kurus, karena saya tahu itu hanya bagian untuk ‘mengamankan’ diri saya. Walaupun suka hampir semua jenis masakan, saya tak suka soda dan nasi PUTIH.

8. Jika disuruh memilih kemampuan, saya ingin saya bisa menyanyi, main musik, dance, dan otak cerdas.

9. Saya tidak habis pikir dengan negara saya sendiri. Mulai dari SDM, kemiskinan, korupsi, bajakan, pendidikan, para wakil rakyat, media massa, kendaraan, ilmu, selera, kebodohan, pikiran kolot dan kreativitas serta sifat keras kepala.

10. Saya ingin menghabiskan masa dewasa dengan traveling around the world bersama keluarga dan teman-teman yang saya cintai. Tentunya dengan hasil jerih payah sendiri. Sebab saya tak ingin memiliki sesuatu berdasarkan hasil minta-minta orang tua, apalagi suami.

Saya akan pass kan ini ke Berline, soalnya dia baru komen saya....

Labels: hate, Life, love, truth

"God love your soul and your aching bones.."

9:21 PM

2 COMMENTs {pick me, choose me, love me!}